Sunday, February 20, 2011

No Greater Victory

Full Circle.

That's what I'd like to call the last six months of my life. After a year of searching, I got a job teaching in Brooklyn, then, six months later, I am again unemployed. That appears to be full circle.

Only it's not. You see, those six months taught me crucial and strong lessons, and rather than a full circle, I'd like to think of it as a great leap forward.

From about week four, things have been shady at my workplace. My kids were AMAZING, like, incredibly amazing, in ways I cannot describe. For their presence in my life I will be forever thankful. Each of them had something special to share with me, and there is not a single one I feel I could have done without. I will miss them daily, but I at least know I can continue to pray for them as they make their way to great things. And yes, they will do great things. I'd like to think that in the short time I was in their lives, I was a part of that.

Now, I won't go into great detail over the shadiness I witnessed, or the many injustices I feel me, my coworkers, and my children suffered through at the hands of big egos, but what I will say is that it has been a true test of faith. God has shown me how to 100% hand the reigns over to him. I would not have survived this long without his help.

I went to work each day coated in the armor described in Ephesians 6. Each morning, I woke up to spend time in the word. The worse things got, the earlier I woke up. Though I lived but a ten minute walk away, I awoke between 5:15 and 5:30 so I could soak up the necessary nourishment I needed to get through each challenging day. (I also consumed lots of coffee, but that's a different thing altogether).

Just today, I heard a pastor say "Sometimes Satan's greatest tool is to give us exactly what we want." That's exactly what happened with this job. It seemed so perfect I couldn't pass it up, knowing that deep down, I was being tugged the other way by the force that I usually am able to follow. But for some reason, I chose otherwise. I now put myself in a position of full on spiritual warfare. Not just minor battles, but flaming arrows as described in Ephesians. It was like the Hunger Games being waged in my soul. But armed with Christ, I pressed on.

It would appear that being "terminated" would be Satan winning. But oh how true is the contrary. I had been waiting for an out for a while, and praying that God would either give me the strength to leave, let me out, or help me regain my vision and purpose. Well, he did the last two. I regained my vision, and then was let go, and I've never felt better.

THAT, friends, is victory in Jesus. When you can lose a job, and be truly ecstatic about it. I immediately extended my trip home from one week to three. Hello Mardi Gras, and I left for Washington, DC two days earlier than planned, where I had a FANTASTIC time by the way.

I've had overwhelming support from concerned parents at the school, who also witness the injustices there and are glad I got out. They have reassured me that my time there was worth the impact it made, and that is all the comfort I need.

I've witnessed an LSU National Championship (among many other nail biting games). I've seen the Saints win the Superbowl after a never ending series of heartaches, but I now know what it's like to watch God outright win a raging spiritual battle, and man it feels SWEET! I cannot imagine a greater victory.