Now What?

Five years and a couple of months after the LSU-Georgia game of 2003, I walked across a stage in the Pete Maravich Assembly Center and received a degree, or at least a diploma cover (they give you the actually diploma after the ceremony).

I kept thinking of that football game, and how, when I made that decision, right there on the 40 yard line, to become a Tiger, I never imagined how fast it would go by.  I don't think I ever actually pictured the end ever getting here.  

I had a good bit of fun, and now, that part of my life is over.  It still hasn't completely sunken in yet.  It's strange to think that next time I go to Baton Rouge, it will be to pick up my things and leave forever.  I still feel like as soon as the Christmas season is over, and upon return from the Atlanta trip, I will be going back to the normal routine I have grown accustomed to.

But I won't. 

In two weeks, I will have a classroom of my own, and responsibilities I cannot yet imagine.  

Okay, I'll be honest, I'm not really sure I want to imagine them. 

It's also strange that right now, I don't really have any responsibility. I woke up this morning, finished It Never Rains in Tiger Stadium, a book in which John Ed Bradley talks of emotions and uncertainties I am all too familiar with right now (except the whole football thing).  I then watched a little television, and finally left the house to fight Westbank traffic and run an errand for my mom.  I ended up at Starbucks.  After all, where else does one go when one has no responsibility.  I am finished Christmas shopping, and truly cannot afford to do any other shopping since I have no more income until that first pay check comes through next month. So I sit, and wait, and read.  Lots of reading.  I've got lots of catching up to do.  Out of fear of spending this money I do not have, I have banned myself from visiting the Sports, Biography, History, Children's, and Local sections of Barnes and Noble.  

This basically leaves self-help and fiction, which are not worth fighting crowds to explore.  This is not to say there aren't other sections at the BN, but those are the only other two I might possibly buy from, and frankly, I just don't feel like getting out to look through them.  

Call me a hermit.  

I will have no life this semester, which is probably a good thing, considering I have three different preps (meaning, I have to write and prepare lessons for three different classes). January 5th seems eerily closer than I would like for it to be.  I once was very excited about teaching, but I'm not so sure anymore.  

I want to write, I've always wanted to write, and eventually I will.  Now that I'm about to begin my career, I am more and more certain that I want to write, eventually to the point where I don't have to have a teaching career anymore.  

How certain am I though?  That's the scary part...  

So for now, I'm going with the career which fits my degree, and I will later go back and get more degrees, because lets face it, I love school and learning.   Once I have gotten into the swing of things, I fully intend to do part time school and keep this whole education thing going. 

Until then, I guess I will have to see if I fall back in love with teaching once I have a classroom of my own.  

So yeah, I've graduated, and I am fully in quarter-life crisis mode. 

I Guess I Should Show up for Graduation...

It's my last full day in the city for a while, and I am super sad.

I should be happy, seeing as how on Friday I get a college degree and all, but it seems anti-climactic since I am having to leave the place I want to live in order to get it.  I figured out that, at this point, if I hadn't found a job yet, I'd be going home, getting my car, and driving back up after Christmas to stay until I got on my feet.  

I am ready to move. 

Don't get me wrong, I LOVE New Orleans.  I love the random jazz bands on the street.  I love the river and the bridges that cross it.  I love the ferry.  I love the smell of whisky and beer mixed with humidity that permeates the air (and I don't even like whisky and beer, just that smell).  I love the broken sidewalks and the cast iron balconies.  I love Canal Street at Christmas.  I love streetcars.  I love St. Charles Avenue, any time of year.  I love the strange accent that has come about from the mixture of ancestries of that great city.  I love listening to those accents and trying to figure out what part of the city people are from.  

I love my family. 

But, even loving all of this stuff, I feel like I should be in New York.  This church family of mine has really gotten to me, and I am going to miss them like crazy, once again, until the next time I find time to come visit.  It won't be Mardi Gras, it won't be Spring Break, so who knows, it might not be until I move up here this summer (though the thought of waiting that long stabs me in the heart... I haven't gone that long since I was here that summer).  

Last night, I made one of my favorite memories of all time.  I'm pretty sure it tops the New York list of memories, and it's right up there with the random pre-Katrina Christmas snow on my list of winter memories.  Ashley and I decided, after both of us had  been wanting to for a while, to go up to the roof of the MNYBA building (this is where I lived when I was here, and where she lives now).  The snow, which had barely stuck to some of the cars on the street, had COATED the roof.  We got the idea to then start making snowballs and tossing them at unsuspecting objects below.  So, first we aimed and parked cars, then moving cars, then bikers, walkers, dogs, etc.... We never meant to actually hit people, but we liked to land them right in front of them and see their reaction.  Mackenzie came up and joined in on the fun.  We laughed for about an hour straight.  It made for an amusing way to come home.  

Today, I'm going to go out, enjoy the city, get some shopping done, show up at the Graffiti Christmas dinner with my best caroling voice ready to go, and walk around Alphabet City singing to strangers through restaurant windows and down the sidewalks of Tompkins Square Park.  

Then, I'm going to pack up, and hop on an early morning flight to go home to the place that made me who I am, and dream of the place that's changed my heart. , snow

Cooper Union and Starbucks

I am imagining that there cannot be much better in the world than sitting in Starbucks, looking out the window, listening to the Elizabethtown soundtrack, drinking a signature hot chocolate, and thinking of all the blessings in my life.

Day after day two summers ago I walked by the Cooper Union, and thought how funny it is that you can be sitting in one Starbucks, looking at the other one block away, and how, at one time, there was also a Barnes and Noble in view, which contained a cafe serving Starbucks coffee.  I guarantee you if you pump the blood of most New Yorkers, it contains 10% espresso.  

I've had a lot of time to think these past few days.  I've spent most of my time walking around aimlessly (literally, with no aim or direction), thinking and praying, and being thankful for the blessing this city has been on my life.  

It was here that I fell in love with Jesus all over again my freshman year, and discovered just how much I love serving him.  It's where I met many of my best friends, both from LSU and from NY.  It's where I found the joy that comes from teenagers, and where I learned that I thrive on lights and sounds.  New York City has had an unbelievable influence on my college years.  I, in fact, cannot imagine what my life would be like had I not come on that trip freshman year.  I'm not really sure I want to. 

Joy is truly the only word I can think of to use in describing how I feel when I am here.  I cannot wait to be here all the time.  Really.  

I love New Orleans, and I don't think there could possibly be a more unique and interesting place in all of America, but New York has gotten under my skin, and I don't see it leaving any time soon.  

City Love

I am once again, in New York, and wish I could be here for good.

I am in love with my church, and all of the things they do in the name of Jesus to reach the people of New York for him.  I am, as always, humbled by them.  

I came up with no plan, no places specifically to go, and I am loving the results.  I went to Connecticut for two days, and spent some time relaxing with the families who took me in this summer.  I forever thankful for those people in my life.  God has blessed me so much with families and friends all over this area, and their value in my life is indescribable.  For the two-and-a-half hour bus ride home, I relaxed and took in everything that was going on around me with some much needed thinking and prayer time.  I got a chance to refocus and prepare for the week ahead.  I haven't felt that blissful and relaxed in a while.  I-pod + warm scarf + sunset over New York City = a beautiful way to spend the afternoon. 

I came back from Connecticut, and immediately went to the Bowery to greet the LSU mission team, and to have dinner with them.  I have been pretty much nonstop since then.  After church today, we went ice skating with the youth, and I got to chaperone.  I cannot express the joy I get out of spending time with those youth, even if it gets to be stressful at times.  After wrangling them all up at the end of the night, we went back to Graffiti, waited around for parents, and then decided to go debrief.  So Christopher, the youth minister, and I, went to the Strand bookstore and enjoyed browsing one of New York's greatest shopping treasures - 18 miles of books.  We also explored the Union Square Holiday Market.  These are the kinds of days I look forward to whenever I am not here.  

I have no doubt, that even with no plans, the rest of my week will turn out just as eventful. 

Upcoming Adventure

I am two days away from being finished with school forever (well, until grad school at least).  This is a little scary but quite exciting.

I will check out on Wednesday, and in grand Danielle fashion, I am flying to New York Wednesday night.  I am hoping not to have to run off to NY all the time after this summer, because I will already be there :)  

I have been so busy it really doesn't feel like I'm going on a trip, but I am super excited about it as it is approaching.  Now I only have to get started on that packing (see below...) and find out where I'm going to get enough spending money.  

The weather report predicts lots of snow in Connecticut, where I will be on Thursday through Saturday.  Snow is something new and interesting for me, so I am super excited!  The Laws have warned me that there will be lots and lots of it...  

I am also, of course, thrilled to be going to see my Graffiti family.  I miss them like crazy.  I can't wait to be around them all the time.  I am staying with Ashley in my old MNYBA apartment, so that will be lots of fun too!  

I really am going to be sad to leave my kiddos, but I am ready for the next adventure.