Wednesday, May 27, 2009


The time frame I currently find myself in is a strange one.

Everything is sad.  Everything is a goodbye.  Everything is a last.  

Even packing up my classroom had an eerie sadness to it (not to mention that Brandi was pretty much depressed the whole time... that didn't help).  

I keep realizing that, when I go places and do things, it's the last time I'm doing them as a resident of Louisiana.  There's just something a bit depressing about that.  

Everything makes me nervous.  Everything scares me a little. 

Emailing people about apartments and getting responses has been more frightening than I expected.  It's a weird feeling having strangers email you and tell you they will see you on Saturday, and that you may potentially be LIVING with them.  

Realizing that I may not have a job teaching come August makes me a little nervous as well.  Not worried, just nervous.  There's a difference. 

At the end of the day, thankfully, the feeling that dominates all others is happiness, and excitement.  Though I have to remind myself often, I still know that what I am doing is what I've always wanted to do, and that I'm going to be a part of something bigger than I am.  

It makes my heart warm to know that I get to be in the city that stole my heart for good.  No more running off to it every time I get a break.  It is going to be home.  I'll miss my true home, sure, but when it comes down to it, I can't wait for what's to come.  

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